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There are spoilers in this review. Duh.

I knew last week was too nice. The Stark reunion was too beautiful. It made us too happy. So they had to destroy us. I’ve seen a lot of people say that the death in this one was harder to watch than even the Red Wedding, and I think I know why. It’s because Hodor was an innocent. He was a good person who was dealt a terrible hand of cards but remained a sweet presence.¬†While I was sad about the Red Wedding, you can’t deny that it was Robb’s choices that put them all in that position. Ned’s death, Oberyn’s death, they had a hand in their fate. Hodor just never had a damn chance at a normal life, and that is devastating to come to terms with. Well done, show. I’m going to go cry in a corner now. Oh yeah, previously on Game of Thrones, Bran keeps running through the past but the Raven tells him not to get lost there. Littlefinger is bringing Sansa an army from the Eyrie. Jon and Sansa want to take back Winterfell, and Ramsay has Rickon. Yara and Theon were preparing for the Kingsmoot. Arya was training to be an assassin.

I’m going to start with Bran’s storyline and get it out of the way. Bran is a damn idiot. This kid never listens to other people, and it leads to trouble for everyone. He witnesses the creation of the White Walkers, where the Children of the Forest created them by putting dragonglass dagger through a man’s heart. Magic! But obviously this did not turn out well for anyone. They wanted to fight off the humans. Bran decides to sneak over the tree and go into the past himself without the Raven’s help, because he is the worst Stark. Or maybe the most accurate Stark since they all shoot themselves in the foot. He meets the Night King, who sees him clear as day standing there, and touches him. It’s cool to think of this episode in terms of what Bran is doing, because he can be seen and touched when he’s walking around, and he can change the past. The walkers now know where he is and they’re coming for them. Bran gets stuck in memories and the zombies descend upon the tree. Meera yoinks him and starts running, pulling him out of controlling Hodor by doing that. Summer gets killed by the zombies protecting them. ANOTHER DIREWOLF DOWN WHY? Noooo. Rage. The Raven dies as well from the Night King, and Meera and Bran are fleeing. Hodor is forced to hold the door of the cave with all the zombies screaming and trying to get past him, scratching his face and eventually killing him. We see Bran is back in that memory of when Hodor was a child and able to talk, and through warging he appears to give Hodor a glimpse of the future. It causes him to have something of a stroke, and all he hears in this traumatic event is Meera screaming HOLD THE DOOR HOLD THE DOOR. Which turns into Hodor, so we see how he became who he is. How freaking tragic. He spent his entire life this way because Bran Stark is a careless idiot. AGHHHH still so mad at him. Good luck trying to survive all alone, you two. Poor Hodor. Poor Summer.

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Nope nope nope. Focusing on the rest. My heart hurts. Sansa has an INCREDIBLE scene with Littlefinger where she verbally rips him to shreds and tells him about what Ramsay did. He tries to weasel his way out of it but knows he can’t. She tells him she doesn’t want his army. I know this is controversial, because they could use that freaking army to win, but she knows that Littlefinger is not to be trusted. He betrayed her father and then her, and she saw him kill his own wife. Nah. Outta there Littlefinger, you creep. She chooses not to tell Jon. The whole group of them are off to try and solidify the North’s support. Brienne and Podrick will be send to the Riverlands to get the Tully son their side. Brienne is going there and I know that Jaime is going there too and they’re going to have a reunion on opposite sides and it’s going to break me. Meanwhile Tormund still is completely in love with Brienne and it makes me laugh. See the gif below.

Jorah tells Dany he’s dying, and they have a genuinely sad moment. He confesses he loves her and he has to go, but she tells him that he should go get cured and then find her again, because she wants him back to her side. What I like about this relationship is that it’s unrequited, and Dany isn’t blamed for not loving him back. He doesn’t expect her to love him just because he loves her. It’s nice. Tyrion and Varys decide to get some help from the same people as Melisandre, and we meet a new Red Woman named Kinvara who is ready to help them. She believes Dany is the person of prophecy, who Melisandre currently thinks is Jon instead. Arya is tasked for her first real assassination of an actress doing ridiculous plays about the drama over in Westeros. Some of it is funny, some of it irritates Arya, like insulting her father’s memory. She ends up liking the actress and shows some doubt about killing her. Jaqen is like dude. This is the deal. Get with the program. Yara and Theon try to get the throne for Yara, but her uncle Euron wins. The two of them manage to flee with good ships. Euron plays a bit of his hand by admitting he plans on bringing his ships over to Dany and offering himself in marriage. She does need ships in order to go home, so this might be an interesting question. Of course Yara and Theon also have ships, maybe they can get there first.

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A lot happened this week! As you can tell. They are packing these episodes full of things. This episode was very strong. I was already like fist pump yasssss about Sansa, even if I was a little bit like TAKE THE ARMY. But Littlefinger’s a sneak. Can’t trust him. If they can unify the North it’ll be even better. Props to Sophie Turner who is absolutely killing it this season. I’m interested to see what the Greyjoy storyline is going to give us long term. I’m still heartbroken over Hodor and Summer. What brave characters, and yes, Summer is a character in my head. They sacrificed their lives and they were innocent. My heart. This place is merciless so we know that, but now I’m just waiting for my other good characters to die. Brienne is the most decent person on the show right now. I am like don’t hurt herrrrrr.

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