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There are spoilers in this review. Duh.

I am behind ha ah ahahahah do this fast self. No one cares but you. I will say that Snow and Charming surprised me this episode, and in a good way, although not as completely as I’d like. I really did believe them being idiots, which is more of a glare at OUAT’s writing then for the characters themselves. Arthur is pretty terrifying in that privileged white dude with power type of way. I dig it. Maybe this means Merlin won’t be evil. He better not be. Merlin’s awesome. Anyway previously on Once Upon a Time, Emma’s now the Dark One. It happened when they were in Camelot and she cursed the town so no one has their memories, because OUAT loves the trope of amnesia. She’s angry at people. Or only with her parents and Regina, since she isn’t mad at Hook and Henry at all? She wants to put Excalibur and the knife back together for ultimate power or some nonsense like that. Rumple is back because the show hates me and she wants to make him a hero. FIND A REAL HERO. Sigh. Also Arthur’s kind of evil/ominous. Nice.

So the flashback! Charming and Snow bicker over who to trust, Lancelot or Arthur. We have a flashback in the flashback, because we see how Arthur came from nothing to get the sword and become the King. Guinevere he loved when they were peasant children. He became obsessed with fixing the sword and getting Merlin back, neglecting his wife and people. Guinevere and Lancelot did sort of fall for each other, but she was determined to get her husband back. They try to get the knife from Rumple, but instead he gives them magic that will fix anything “broken.” Guinevere wants to heal Arthur’s mind, but he uses it on her instead. She’s now obedient to his every whim. Very, very creepy. Snow trusts Lancelot, Charming trusts Arthur, or so we think, but eventually they reveal that they set a trap up together. They caught Arthur by pretending to give him the dagger for Emma, but then he and Guinevere use their zombie powder on the Charmings. They then tell Regina they want the dagger. She doesn’t immediately go ARE YOU HIGH? at them, which she should have. Also why didn’t they tell her the plan? She seems like a great person to have in the know about this. Also Emma and Hook do some romantic stuff. Eh. And Merida’s in the prison cells with Lancelot now.

ONCE UPON A TIME - "The Broken Kingdom" - After receiving a cryptic warning from Lancelot about Arthur's intentions, Mary Margaret realizes Arthur may be the heroes' biggest threat, but when she is unable to convince David of the danger, she takes matters into her own hands. Meanwhile, Hook's unwavering love for Emma provides a glimmer of hope in her struggle against the unrelenting voice of Rumplestiltskin. In a Camelot flashback, Guinevere senses that Arthur is losing his way, consumed by his obsession with making Excalibur whole, so she sets out with Lancelot on her own quest into the heart of darkness. In Storybrooke, Dark Emma unleashes a secret weapon in the next phase of her plan to find the brave soul she needs to draw Excalibur from the stone, on "Once Upon a Time," SUNDAY, OCTOBER 18 (8:00-9:00 p.m., ET) on the ABC Television Network. (ABC/Jack Rowand) SINQUA WALLS, JOANA METRASS

In Storybrooke … wow I forgot. Now I have to remember. What happened in Storybrooke. Oh my god absolute nothing real happened there. Emma was trying to make Rumple into a hero. He’s still a coward. She has Merida tied up somewhere and she wants Merida to make him brave. They were really barely bothering in that storyline, were they? This was just Camelot heavy, which I don’t mind, because it was all good stuff. The nefarious Arthur is interesting; I like the idea that he’s corrupt. It might come from an originally good place, but his ambition and obsession with power changed him. I hope they don’t try to redeem him. Of course they don’t seem to have a trouble redeeming whiny white dudes despite the fact they emotionally and mentally string their loved ones along. Nope they can become heroes again just because the plot says so, even though the plot has always said over and over again that they make the wrong decisions when given the chance a thousand times. BUT A THOUSAND TIMES AND ONE, THEY TOTALLY DESERVE IT.

I’m not bitter or anything.

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