There are spoilers in this review. Duh.

In the past, I’ve tried to defend some of Game of Thrones‘ more questionable elements. The over abundance of naked women and sexualized moments that don’t need to be. The ridiculous choices to omit plot points from the books that would actually be relevant and great in the show (Tysha, Arianne). The now constant need to throw sexualized violence in every episode. I feel like right now as I’m watching, I’m just trying to black out the parts of the episode that are terrible, and focus on the good ones. Because there are genuinely interesting portions to the story still. It’s just starting to lean more toward generally bad than generally good. Well at least we get to see Dany and Tyrion interact finally. And did anyone else want to make a “Mmmm whatcha say” video to Cersei’s face when she realized what was happening? Oh I’m sure it’s coming. Previously on Game of Thrones, Cersei let the High Sparrow and his religious nuts take over the city because she wanted the Tyrells taken care of. As usual her arrogance blinds her to what’s coming. Tyrion was stolen from Varys by Jorah, who wanted to give him to Dany, and they were both taken by slavers. They ended up going to Dany anyway. Sansa got married to Ramsay and it’s as awful as you think. Jon agreed to persuade the Wildlings to come and help the Wall, even if everyone hates that idea. Stannis was too impatient to get going against the Boltons to wait for Jon’s potential help.

In storylines I don’t want to deal with: Bronn’s poisoned. One of the Sand Snakes unnecessarily warns him, shows her naked form to him until he says she’s the most beautiful woman, and gives him the antidote. Instead of just letting him die and/or not being pointlessly over-the-top sexual. This is to mask over the fact nothing actually matters in Dorne. Jaime tries to get his daughter-niece to leave with him, and she’s like naw weirdo. Meanwhile Brienne’s hanging out still staring at Winterfell, doing nothing. Sansa’s been horrendously abused and raped by Ramsay as we all feared. She begs Theon to help her and tells him about the candle in the tower, because she’s desperate. And I don’t think anyone fully understands the levels of which Theon is Reek until they are betrayed by Reek directly like this. He tells Ramsay about it and the old Northern woman is killed. I really, really, really hope Brienne comes and destroys you. I mean I’d much rather Sansa destroy you, Ramsay, but I’ll take Brienne. If she ends up victimized by him too, I’ll destroy everything. I wish these storylines weren’t so awful and boring/harmful to watch, but they are, so I’m going to pretend they don’t exist until I’m forced to see otherwise.

55629201b80bcc99383ae3b4gotmp091914ep507-33681Jon leaves to go to the wildlings. Oh look another unnecessary attempted rape scene of Gilly. What the hell, why would they think she would immediately jump into bed with Sam for “saving” her from the trauma? You writers are pathetic. Let’s just hit all the tropes under the sun. Blech. So now the Wall is off my list of intriguing storylines too. Hopefully Jon’s headed somewhere interesting. Stannis is unfortunate in that he and his people aren’t ready to take on Winterfell. Because it’s freezing and horrible up there and only Northerners are really good at that. He asks Melisandre for help, she assures him the Boltons will be defeated, but says she’d like to sacrifice his daughter to make good on it. Stannis is like “UM NO? SHE IS THE MOST LIKABLE THING ABOUT ME.” I think her wording is deliberate in that she’s going to be in Winterfell and the Boltons will be defeated. It doesn’t mean Stannis specifically does it, or that he’s alive to see it done. I’m thinking it’s more likely Jon’s going to come down with the wildlings and take care of business. One interesting note: Sansa was told that Jon is now Lord Commander of the Wall. I wonder if this will be one of those things where Jon arrives there only for Sansa to be fleeing with Brienne and they miss each other.

Finally in the storylines I actually like, Jorah and Tyrion are brought to a slave fight pit match. No one expected Dany to be there, but she’s awkwardly attempting to prove her support. When Jorah realizes it’s her out there, he breaks into the fight and beats everyone. You can see her slowly start to be pulled in by his fighting; maybe she recognizes him, or feels like she should. It’s a very emotional moment for both of them, and she tells them to take him away. But then Tyrion shows up and says he’s the gift Jorah brought to her. What she’ll use him for is anyone’s guess. I can’t wait to see what their interaction will be like. Finally Cersei was so delighted to be winning against Margaery that she didn’t see the very, very, very obvious thing coming for her. She was even warned by her cousin Lancel that he was in the Sparrows and remembered what they did to Robert. She’s so wrapped up in her own power and cleverness, and that’s why she has no chance when the High Sparrow catches and throws her in jail. Welcome to the inevitable, Cersei. Except there is probably no one willing to speak up for any of you now. King’s Landing is essentially under arrest. Dun dun duuuuun.

I think my opinion is fairly clear above. I am unimpressed with their work this season. 75% of this episode made me cringe. I am looking forward to the Dany/Tyrion storyline, although I assume that will eventually get messed up too somehow. While I do enjoy the “be careful what you wish for” mindset of the Cersei plot, considering how much this show is enjoying  humiliating, sexualizing, and abusing women, I’m not actually looking forward to it. Whether or not she deserves it, it’s starting to get really uncomfortable. I feel about that the way I felt about Theon’s constant torture: enough enough enough. That was torture porn. This isn’t much better. Here’s hoping they can find a better plot in the next few episodes.


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