Dee Discusses: True Blood 5.11

Posted: August 21, 2012 by Dee in Dee, General Media, Recaps, Television, True Blood
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Alcide’s body makes everything better.

Oh geez okay where to start on this episode. Things are crazy. End of the recap. All right so let’s start with Jessica since she gets it moving. Immediately she wants to warn the Stackhouses about Russell, but Bill’s like lol we hate humans now they’re just food. Jess, naturally, is freaked out at his ongoing crazy. She tries to manipulate him by saying she wants to turn Jason, and he actually sees right through that and decides to teach her a lesson by forcing her to turn Jason for real. She goes with two guards and has to bite Jason, but somehow tells him the plan which is to let them start digging a grave. When they’re distracted, Jason shoots them both with wooden bullets and it’s over. Jessica takes this chance to tell Jason about Russell so he can go protect Sookie, and she reveals she would want to try and spend eternity with him if she had a chance. Jason’s only response is a look – da fuq? He has to go find Sookie, who is meeting a fairy elder.

This is the older fairy who came over with them. She dances and asks really random questions because apparently she’s hooked into all times. I think she’s like the Doctor from Doctor Who, only in bright clothing and a fairy and doing remedial intro to dance moves. Anyway she tries to tell Sookie about Warlow but is stopped when Jason comes in with news about Russell. Fairy Lady is scared of him too, but Sookie encourages them all to fight him. Come on, there’s like 40 of them, can’t they take on Russell? Or distract him long enough for someone else to take him out? That’s her line of thinking. Mariella or whatever her name is goes to tell Andy she’s pregnant. He’s confused because they had sex like a week ago. She’s a fairy, idiot. She says he’s sworn an oath to protect them, and I have no idea what she wants from him. He’s doing well with Holly, and Terry and Arlene seem to be all better from his murder Ifirit crazy story. So. Yay? Jason willingly goes back to the house so he can be glamored by Russell into taking them to the field. Steve and Russell freak out over the smell of fairies. Isn’t this a good time to kill them when they’re just running around high as a kite? Also they’re all just WATCHING them. Can’t they do spells from in there?

Apparently my logic is invalid. Fairy Queen goes out to stop him and gets herself murdered instead. Oh that was smart. Soon as he eats her he can see all the other fairies. So so so so smart.

Everyone’s still crazy in the vampire lair. Jess hides with Tara and Pam who are freaking out about killing the Sheriff. Jess tells Pam where Eric is, and Pam figures out pretty quickly they’re in a “nest.” WHY HASN’T THIS BEEN DISCUSSED BY ANYONE ELSE SO FAR? I know it’s been mentioned in the past, but why didn’t Eric or Bill come to this conclusion a lot earlier? UGH. That’s when vampires spend too much time in their own group drinking from each other and becoming like a creepy mob. And getting drugged up on Lilith blood. Tara’s getting a crush on Pam, and Pam is arrested by the Authority for killing the Sheriff. She probably doesn’t mind because she thinks Eric’s there, but he’s not. The human General who deals with them warns everyone about being crazy pants, so Eric kills him. This gives him and Nora a chance to leave and say they’re doing it to help everyone. Jess gets dragged in too and is promptly smacked by Bill, because he is the CHOSEN ONE. Except Lilith is telling a lot of people they’re the chosen one. She’s a fickle lady.

Oh right so Nora is no longer crazy because seeing Godric made her sane again. I’m okay with this, because Godric is perfect. I have no idea what the two of them are planning though. Luna and Sam shift and get caught, but Luna is kept with the other humans and sees her little Emma. Sam is being taken to Bill as breakfast. Uh oh. Oh and Alcide is still on this show. Shirtless. Because obviously. He’s making a silver fence around their trailer and goes to help another trailer from scary baby vamps. He and his dad kill them and bond. To sum up: Russell’s about to eat a lot of fairies. The vampires are nested and crazy. No one knows WTF is up with Lilith yet. My guess is she might be a fairy spirit. Why not? Everything she’s done has tried to destroy vampires or have them destroy one another. Who else but a fairy would have a lot to gain from all the vamps killing one another? Maybe Lilith is playing the long con and has been a fairy all along. I don’t know, I like it. I have no idea who is going to take out Russell, he’s pretty tough. Will we get to see Warlow this year or is that held off until next? I guess I’ll have to see next week. I’m eager for the finale!

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